I saw this earlier tonight.
Duane Chapman AKA "Dog The Bounty Hunter" called Dr. Jill Biden a "Witch Doctor."
Like, are you fucking kidding me? I didn't even know this stupid dipshit was still around.
And he said this shit at some kind of Evangelical conference?
Yeah, because that's what who I think of when I meditate on the Lord's Word, some stupid jackoff fake bounty hunter with a murder conviction who's been divorced like six times and has twelve kids.
I mean that seriously, dude was convicted of murder in Texas back in the 1970s and cannot legally own or carry weapons.
And isn't this fucker like 70 years old or something? Shouldn't he have retired and died of old age and maybe embarrassment by now?
I never caught more than bits and pieces of his show, and was not impressed by what little I did see. I knew people that had people who watched this crap, and I never heard anything good about it. The main thing I remember about Dog The Bounty Hunter is that it was canceled in 2007 after some kind of racist incident. Truthfully, the main reason I remember that is such things were usually bigger news at the time and certainly less common than they are these days.
So, naturally, it's 2022 and this dude is speaking at an Evangelical conference? I mean come on, what the fuck?
I mean, it's been a minute, but aren't Christians supposed to have, ya know...standards??
Of course, the Republican men of Sodom and their Evangelical gimps would hold this motherfucker up as some kind of an exemplar.
Because of course they would.
Because every word of the Sermon on the Mount, much less the extensive codes of conduct outlined in Paul's letters means absolutely nothing to these fucking people.
These sons of bitches don't care about any of that, they'd rather score points in some kind of Republican Chucklefuck Olympics while trying to immanentize some kind of bullshit right-wing eschaton, and there's a certain percentage of White America that gets off on this kind of circus-stunt stupidity.
Have we, as a people, no goddamned self-respect?
At this rate, the proverbial bottom of the barrel is the goddamned Event Horizon of a Singularity of Stupid that is eventually going to swallow the Earth whole from within.
I mean, look at this shit, I wouldn't let a dude that looked like that in my own house. I don't give a damn how much you want to talk Bible, for one thing, if you make absolutely no effort to live by it that's all it is, empty talk.
Second, motherfucker looks like a scumbag.
He doesn't look like a bail bondsman or a "Bounty Hunter" he looks like somebody who'd be calling a goddamn bail bondsman at three in the goddamned morning because he got pulled over for driving too fast the wrong way down a one way street and when the cops searched the car he got busted with a kilo of cocaine, three underage Thai prostitutes and a trunk full of homemade zip guns and cheap 3D-Printed sex toys paid for with stolen US Dollars stamped "Property of the Islamic State."
But it's FLOTUS who's a "Witch?" Seriously dude, fuck this silly bullshit.
And while I'm at it, fuck anybody who believes in this crap.
Or maybe just don't, ever. We don't need any more of these fucking people.
And I'm here to tell you, I've never had a literal belief in Witchcraft...not the way these fucking people mean it, anyway. (Because for one thing, various Pagan belief systems don't actually meet the Abrahamic definition of Witchcraft which is trying to use spiritual power to hurt others). Among other things, living in these fucking people's Demon Haunted World never would have occurred to the people who taught me Christian doctrine or how to be a Christian or how to conduct myself.
People like "Dog the bounty hunter" and all the other reality TV bullshitters, and the rabid selfishness first popularized by shows like Survivor are exactly what injected grifters and idiots like Sarah Palin and eventually Donald Trump, Lauren Boebert and Marjorie Taylor Greene into our political system.
This stupid garbage, and people like Duane Chapman are exactly why half the middle aged and old white dudes in America have some kind of aggrieved gun-toting Peter Pan syndrome and think they gonna take on a whole bunch of 20-year old soldiers who have weapons that they, for the most part, are not smart enough to even imagine.
And the worst part is, it's all fake. Dog isn't some kind of a tough guy, he can't even carry a weapon for fuck's sake! He doesn't think "Being Tough" he thinks Life insurance premiums and Viagra! We need to stop putting up with this shit, 'cause if we don't, real people are going to get killed because of all this fake bullshit!
If we continue to tolerate this crap, these idiots are going to try and burn down civilization for no better reason than they think it's funny.
And while I'm at it, if you think somebody like this, who's lived this way, can authoritatively preach the Lord's Word, you're stupid and you deserve exactly what you're going to get.
Seriously, if entities like the Elder Gods of Lovecraftian stories actually existed, would these stupid fucking people even know the difference between that and their supposed belief in Christianity?
Or would they try to wake up those beings just to "Own the Libs" or some dumb thing?
Yes, I'm sick of this shit.
The question is, why aren't you?
Think about this; think about how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of 'em are stupider than that. ~George Carlin
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