When In Rome... (Woke Weasels, You Asked For It, Part One.)

I will sodomize you and face-fuck you, Bottom Aurelius and Catamite Furius You who think, because my verses Are delicate, that I am modest. For it's right for the devoted poet to be chaste Himself, but it's not necessary for his verses to be so. Verses which then have taste and charm, If they are delicate and sexy, And can incite an itch And I don't mean in boys, but in those hairy old men Who can't get their dicks up. You, because you have read of my thousand kisses. You think I'm a sissy? I will sodomize you and face-fuck you. ~Catallus 16

My mood after this last week could be charitably described as "Blood! Blood for the Blood God! Skulls! Skulls for the skull throne!"

From idiots out in the world to idiots at work, well, I'm fucking sick of dealing with stupidity.

Last week, some conservative Republican lawyer from Las Vegas wrote an article in the Orlando Sentinel bitching about how Disney being too "Woke" was ruining the experience of Disney World for him. Seriously, people, do yourselves a favor and don't be this fucking guy. I'm serious. From homophobia to transphobia to racism and sexism to war and peace, these motherfucking people are always on the wrong side of every issue imaginable.

Seriously, in most cases all this "Woke" stuff is, is common courtesy, updated to the 21st century.

None of this sexual stuff, freaky or otherwise, is anything new. The pull-quote is an ancient Roman poet for a goddamned fucking reason.

Most of the basis for modern social conservatism comes from two sources, Greek philosophy and Roman imperialism. In other words, two of the most bisexual cultures to ever exist foisted this crap on the world. You'd think these fucking people would notice. 

Not a damned one of the sexual issues or orientations that conservatives get their collective panties in a wad over these days would have been foreign to Romans like Catallus.

And for that matter, not that many of our social issues aside from those related specifically to science or technology would be new, either. The Romans practiced various forms of abortion, for one.

But wait! That's not all!

I'm here to tell you, in point of fact, that the reason Christianity took root in the Empire was that it repackaged Platonic philosophy (which was wildly popular among Roman social conservatives) and turned it into a religion.

Rome and Roman religion did not stress or care about the myths Romans told themselves about being an Agrarian, heterosexual, rural society based around family and stuff. In point of fact, even the wealthy who did fit the mythos were able to maintain a Domus in the country and grow Grapes or Olives or Wheat...were pretty damned bisexual...and they had Gods who justified it all for them and orders of priests to do the same.

And of course it was all bullshit.

So really, the more things change, the more they stay the same.

Likewise, "Cancel Culture" is basically a function of capitalism. If you disagree with somebody, or don't like them or their product, you shouldn't be forced to give them money, right?

Sometimes, in order to continue to maintaian staffing and turn a profit, corporations have to update their stuff. This is perfectly well goddamned normal. That's just life. Neither people nor corporations should sehave to subjugate themselves to the morals of 60 years ago or to some nut's debased sensibilities for the entertainment of raging dickbags.

Capitalism isn't supposed to be a moral, political or social suicide pact.

It's a goddamned marketplace of ideas out there, if you don't like Disney's product, go somewhere else.

Seriously, don't be these fucking people.

Look, dude, I'm a fat middle-aged white guy myself. Not a day goes by I don't feel left behind, or like I'm too old for this shit. Probably nine out of ten times that happens though, it's some combination of modern "Conservatives" and the internet that's responsible for it.

The difference between me and this asshole is that I don't think I have the right to impose my attitudes and beliefs on other people. I've never thought I did, either. 

I've been around the world, though. I've been to places where old conservative assholes of different persuasions run the country according to their preferences.

You want to live that way? Go try your luck in Dubai or Saudi Arabia. Odds are you can even do so while still working for an American company, because capitalism.

Nothing in today's world says you gotta stay here.

But here? This is America. Our country was founded based on working for equality. That's what the phrase "More perfect union" in our founding documents even means. Our founders, unlike Roman social conservatives, well understood that liberty is an evolving process.

It's not "Social engineering" when things change.

It's who we are. It's what we do. America was founded on the principle, on the very possibility of social change...which was not a common thing at that time and happened only gradually if at all, barring global-scale disasters or political and social movements causing it...and that's why people wanted to come here and still do.

And that's why, for so much of our history, the whole world was watching. 

That's why in the 1950's production of "The King And I" with Yul Brenner, set during the time of the US Civil War, the King of Siam and his advisors were earnestly debating tactical advice with American diplomats and offering them things like war Elephants to turn the tide.

There was a time when we knew, or at least still remembered, that we were supposed to be something different.

And if you can't hack that, maybe the problem is you.

That conservatives desire altars and thrones and societal stasis...but yet turn to agents of chaos like Donald Trump to get it...well, to me that shows how these fucking people can't go five minutes without contradicting themselves, which actually undermines their entire argument.

Undoing generations of social change...which I'm old enough to have lived through some of...would in fact create massive social change and upend our entire society.

Change is, paradoxically, our only constant.

All we have is what we want to be. Our central tenet of being as a nation is a question.

What do we want to be when we grow up?

The conservatism I was taught at least accepted that central truth.

The only aspect of it that today's "Conservatism" embraces is the immaturity.

Meanwhile, while they pitch a fit and stonewall and threaten and very loudly shout that they'll take their collective ball and go home, change continues apace.

When in America, do as the Americans do. That is all.

You asked for it.

Our culture has forgotten what the founders knew;
The American experiment is a moral, not just political exercise.
~Chuck Colson