...There went out a decree from Cracker Barrel Caligula...

And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be taxed. (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.) And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city. And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:) To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child. And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered. And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn. And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. ~Luke 2:1-11

I saw this last night, while I was on break at work. "Real Estate broker uses washed-up rapper to pitch putting presidential library on site of trailer park."

A trailer park that, per the article, is up for sale due to "Infrastructure problems" this being Florida, meaning the water table is likely filling up with saltwater due to sea level rise, among other things.

And the asking price is a billion dollars. Seriously?

I know the majority of the rest of us think Trump is an idiot, but this real estate guy must really think that Trump is an idiot.

It's Christmas Eve.

Are you fucking kidding me?

Seriously, can't these motherfuckers maintain even the barest shred of dignity or sense on Christmas Eve?

No, no, I guess they can't.

Trump is having the site of a trailer park (!) pitched to him by Vanilla Ice (!) as the site of a future presidential library, and Mike Huckabee looks like he's half a jug of Moonshine away from Dueling Banjos and sodomy.

I used to hunt, and I currently live in a trailer park, and...I don't know, help me here. I also used to be a Republican and I guess I just sort of expected, I don't know, some sense of dignity or gravitas from Republican elected officials, current or former.

For fuck's sake when Dick Cheney negligently shot a dude in the face he didn't brag about it on social media. I mean, there were excuses aplenty, but he didn't film a firearms-safety fuck-up live on Twitter while sounding like he's aspiring to some mutant combination of low-rent PBS hunting show and the Old Time Gospel Hour.

For that matter, I'd expect somebody like Mike Huckabee to be a better shot than his needing a semi-automatic shotgun suggests he is. When I was a teenager, my uncle gave me a 16-gauge break-action double-barrel shotgun for duck and turkey hunting, and I'm not gonna lie, if I needed more than two shots to bring down the game the very least I could expect would be to get laughed at.

And if I left my weapon leaning up against a tree, especially loaded, I could logically expect to get smacked upside the head and have it taken away, by a guy whose experience in the Michigan Army National Guard was far outweighed by his years in the woods hunting all type of game, but whose experience in the military also made him very conscious of both safety and the need for accuracy.

I had better than this crap expected of me before I was old enough to vote or join the military, and this is our Republican Party now?

I'm not gonna lie, I find it kind of disgusting that politicians in the United States of America in 2019 brag about being idiots for all the world to see. It's only slightly worse that they do so unintentionally.

And then some dumb bitch in Iowa apparently both assaulted people of color at a gas station and did a hit-and-run on a kid who was walking down the street minding her own business, apparently because Racism, that's why.

She was quoted as saying the girl "Looked Mexican."

No word on the kid's ethnicity, but seriously? Who in the hell is dumb enough to think they're going to get away with running over a kid for some stupid reason?

Laws against murder or attempted murder don't get waived because the victim has brown skin. Oh, and allegedly the woman had used Meth before doing this.

Look, ya'll, if Presidential libraries on the site of broken-down trailer parks, Governor Pretty Mouth, and people running over kids based on their complexion while fucked up on Meth is what modern "Conservatism" has come to, I'll happily double down on my previous statement that I want no damned part of it whatever.

And this is how people want to spend this holiday season?

It's Christmas Eve, can't these people turn their brains back on for two damned days?

I just don't fucking get the attraction to this kind of crap, and I've lived through some pretty fucked up holidays.